Out with the old and in with the new—we’re onto a new decade, y’all! I am so excited to enter the roaring 20’s in a new city and with new perspectives and lessons learned from this year. There have been ups and downs, for sure. But all of it has strengthened who I am and what my values are in this life.

In this post, I reflect on what I gained personally from 2019—including finding a work position that truly fits, rediscovering my adventurous side, and facing a challenging friendship situation. I discuss how my travel priorities have shifted as a result of my move to Miami. I also reflect on my favorite travel moments from this year while gearing up for whats in store in 2020!

Travel in 2019

-DESTINATIONS-
International: Curaçao, Grand Cayman (Current!)
Domestic: Providence, RI, Philadelphia, PA, Denver, CO, Pawleys Island, SC, Miami, FL

This year included a trip that fulfilled a major purpose for me: Healing. I needed to heal from my previous breakup and Curaçao did that for me. I had such a great time there and I had several epiphanies about former relationships and myself.

Curaçao gave me back my adventurous side. On one hand, my trip to Africa was an adventure that I took during my relationship in 2018 that was about fulfilling a childhood dream for me—a safari. On the other hand, I went to Curaçao with no agenda or itinerary. I booked an Airbnb and car rental and then each day was completely up to me to fill. And that was awesome!

I believe in the possibility of both these experiences for myself: Stability and Adventure in the same relationship and in the same life. I say, “Why limit myself?” It’s about finding someone with these same values as me—someone who wants to build a life together and help each other grow through new experiences. If complacency and stubbornness and a one-track mind is a person’s norm, then I can accept where they are at and let them go.

Curaçao reminded me that I didn’t need to compromise part of who I am to have only part of what I want.

Who I Am in 2019 and Beyond

Street art by Garrick Marchena in Curaçao

It seems every time I write one of these updates, I write about growth. I suppose that’s what happens when we look back and reflect on a year. It’s also essentially the underlying theme of deviating (and who I am) – growing from the new experiences I have is the result of pushing myself to deviate.

This year, I am grateful for finally landing my dream job! Moving to Miami was a major career move and important deviation for me.

While my old job was great in many wsys, I also felt held back by it. My new position, which serves mainly LGBTQA college students, allows me the opportunity to serve the population I know best. I studied gender and sexuality as part of my Psychology PhD. Finally, I get to fully put all I know to use and have an impact every day on individuals’ lives.

The challenge for 2020 will be continuing to find balance between this work that I love and the rest of my life! Finding time for making new friends in this new city is a big part of this, too. But I’m workin’ on it!

I am also grateful for a challenge in a friendship that has pushed me to deviate in a nuanced way in 2019.

I made some mistakes in how I handled a really difficult situation. I learned that sometimes, what has worked in the past with the same people won’t work with them in the present or future. Or, sometimes, the approach I take to being supportive does not fit what they need in a particular context. It means I must adapt when I find myself in that context.

Adaptation is an adjustment, not an entire shift in who you are.

What I have always found in friendships and family is: We don’t all have to think the same way or share the same values to continue loving and showing respect for each other. Unless someone has grown consistently and repeatedly toxic in their behavior despite attempts to address it with them, physically harmed you or someone you love and/or seriously psychologically traumatized you or someone you love, I believe in acceptance of where people are, forgiveness for where they’ve been, and establishing boundaries for your own growth, as healthy aspects of building and continuing friendships and relationships with the people you love.

Thankfully, I have a lot of practice with this…

Adapting to New Travel Priorities

This year was also about adapting to change in my travel priorities. For one, my friend Dasha moved to Denver, CO where I visited her for the first time. I also spent a night in Philadelphia with my new partner, Ivana, after I changed my mind about a job prospect at the last minute. And the biggest change of all this year came when I moved to Miami, FL to start a new job and way of life. In doing so, I left behind my girlfriend, family, many friends, and my beloved New York State.

The way I travel now is different. For the second half of this year, travel became about flying back and forth between New York and Miami. As a result, my priorities in how I save my miles, points, and money for travel are different now.

Meanwhile, I am still prioritizing my other travel goals: Vacation travel and international exploration. Now that my home base is Miami, it is my goal to visit as many Caribbean countries as I can squeeze into my time here! Curaçao left such a good impression on me that I want to experience more.

Flying Spirit home to NY for a day trip!

Coming in 2020

Currently, I am keeping to exactly this goal by celebrating 2020 in the Caribbean. I am here with Ivana in Grand Cayman where we are spending New Year’s Eve.

It is my hope that I will be able to plan a longer trip in the summer to somewhere else international. Maybe I will finally make it to Scandinavia, South America, or add to my Caribbean repertoire. Hmmmm! We shall see!

In terms of domestic travel, there are already some possibilities on the table. Denver is a sure one to visit Dasha again. Dallas, TX is another one for a conference with my students in January. And then there was some talk with friends about a trip to NOLA for Mardi Gras. I’ve been to NOLA twice already but not during Mardi Gras—this would be awesome!

Best Travel Moments in 2019

I am really looking forward to the above adventures in 2020—whatever they are! But let’s take a moment to reflect on my top 5 favorite moments from my travels in 2019…

5. Exploring My New Home City (Miami, FL)

I’ve really only started to scratch the surface in my new city. Work has taken up a lot of my free time. But I am finally starting to find balance and that means more Miami highlights and fun exploration. There’s lots to share in the new year about my time here so far—from street art to Hispanic food. I can’t wait to share it all!

More to come from my life in Miami in 2020.

4. Being #SoInfluential In Front of Mountains (Denver, CO)

Posing with Dasha at Realization Point in Colorado

There’s nothing like celebrating your friend’s birthday making fun of Instagram and still taking some epic photos in front of mountains!

3. Bicycling Around Key West, FL

I finally made it to Key West! After visiting the keys a few times, I never went all the way to the end to visit Key West. I finally did in September with Ivana. We had the best time bicycling around together—the easiest, least expensive way to get around town!

More to come from this trip in 2020.

2. Experiencing the Queerness of P-Town, MA

I always knew I’d love Provincetown, MA. I just never knew I’d like it this much! It’s reached my top 5 list of places to visit in the USA—and I explain all about why in my recent post.

1. Snorkeling in a Bait Ball (Curaçao)

This was by far my favorite experience of 2019 and may be in my top 5 travel experiences of all time! This was a beautiful gift from the Caribbean sea that I will never forget.

Happy New Year

As we enter a new decade together—the roaring 20s!—I want to specifically thank you all again for tuning in over the last 5 years. I’ve been writing about my travels for over half a decade and I don’t plan to stop anytime soon. I love it and I am so grateful for your readership. Thank you for tuning in again this year.

Wishing you all a wonderful, travel filled new year full of growth and acceptance!

❤️Rikka

New Years Update: Change in Job, Friendships, & Travel